I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Randomize
