i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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