is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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