i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
So many bounce houses so little time
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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