You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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