VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Randomize
