I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
