I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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