Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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