What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
