Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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