Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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