When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
