Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
can u get pink eye on your cock?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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