Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
