Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
