Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I think people are normalizing furries
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
