If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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