I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
