Whod you bang
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
