wrigley field is MILF paradise
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize
