I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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