a queef is a wish your heart makes.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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