My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize