We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
