We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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