just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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