are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize