just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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