Is it normal to miss your booty call?
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Everyone says I win the strip club
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
