Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
