Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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