okay pat passed out under dana's car
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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