i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
