fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
