I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize