We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
