I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
