New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
