just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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