Already got asked if we're dating
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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