So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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