you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
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