No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
