I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
