he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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