just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
