I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize
