If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
