I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
