I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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