There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
