I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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